Many Mighty Miracles

Something something something...... In the merry merry month of May....
Does anyone else know that song? It just popped into my head...

Hello beautiful friends, family, wonderful souls,

This morning was a time of reflection for me. Today was the start of my very last week as a young, full-time missionary. I really don't know how to adequately express my thoughts, so I decided that I wanted to make a non-inclusive list of things I will miss about the South (and my mission):

-"Have a blessed day!"
-Spanish moss
-Hush puppies and fried creamed corn and real BBQ
-Restaurants where everybody knows everybody and the owner runs the cash register
-Tumble"weaves"
-Random tractors on the side of the road
-How everybody's uncle is a pastor
-Knocking in hundreds of trailer parks and "sketchy" areas where you feel WAY safer than in any fancy neighborhood. True fear comes when knocking on mansions
-Burlap
-Reliable sunshine
-How most people actually wave back
-Cars that pull over and ask if you're okay
-When you come home and wash your hands and the water is black from all of the doors you knocked, hands you shook, and doorknobs you turned to walk out of a home
-The relief of sitting in a car
-The relief of the air conditioning in that same blessed car
-The miracle of complete strangers telling you their most personal thoughts and concerns
-Pouring warm rainstorms where you can't even see the white line on the side of the road
-Not having to deal with the stress of social media
-The joy of seeing someone you love walk into the waters of baptism
-The light that comes into the eyes of someone you're teaching when they "get it" for the first time
-Being the only white person in the store/church/etc.
-Listening to lovely old ladies pray for your safety and protection and "the angels to carry you"
-That Southern drawl:

"I was in the hospital, and I was doin' kindly poorly"
"You have momicked me to death!"
"I've had to DO for him and DO for him..."
"Look at this girl, she done tore up this house!"
"Boy, youse is so bad!"
"Now don't you go makin' yourself sick or nothin'."
"These youngin's are gittin' on my last nerve."
"Can we cut these lights on? I darn can't well see a thing."
"I'm fixin' to ride down to the store, y'all want a ride?"
"Well come on then..."
-Being ecstatic when the person you invited to church actually comes!
-Being devastated when they don't
-Having your whole emotional self be whole-hardheartedly attached to people that you barely know, that don't even know how much you love them
-Praying for people that you've met once, 6 times a day
-Holding hands in a million and one prayer circles
-Having to turn down sweet tea every day when summer rolls around
-How you always smell like cigarettes even though you've never smoked in your life
-Laughing with strangers, and crying with them, and realizing that there are no strangers
-Using your brain rather than using Google
-Loving those precious moments in the morning where you get to feast upon the word. And that hour is the fastest hour of your life...
-Learning to rely on the Lord in all you do, because you realize that's all you CAN do
-Random children that run up to you and hug you for no apparent reason at all
-Walking along empty streets, praying that someone chooses that moment to check their mail
-Feeling more tired than you've ever felt, and more happy than you've ever felt. All at once
-Giving everything you have, everything you desire, and everything you are completely to Him.

I am a daughter. A sister. A friend. I make a lot of mistakes. I still talk too much, and over-analyze, and maybe have much-too-high expectations. But I know that the Lord can make my weak things become strong. I haven't met anyone that I couldn't have a conversation with, I focus on the needs of those we teach, and I work hard.

"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." -Ether 12:27

I cannot express how I feel about missionary work any better than this man, who I admire greatly:

"I have thought about this a great deal. I offer this as my personal feeling. I am convinced that missionary work is not easy because salvation is not a cheap experience. Salvation never was easy. We are The Church of Jesus Christ, this is the truth, and He is our Great Eternal Head. How could we believe it would be easy for us when it was never, ever easy for Him?

If He could come forward in the night, kneel down, fall on His face, bleed from every pore, and cry, “Abba, Father (Papa), if this cup can pass, let it pass,” then little wonder that salvation is not an easy thing for us. If you wonder if there isn’t an easier way, you should remember you are not the first one to ask that. Someone a lot greater and a lot grander asked a long time ago if there wasn’t an easier way.

When you struggle, when you are rejected, when you are spit upon and cast out, you are standing with the best life this world has ever known, the only pure and perfect life ever lived. You have reason to stand tall and be grateful that the Living Son of the Living God knows all about your sorrows and afflictions. The only way to salvation is through Gethsemane and on to Calvary. The only way to eternity is through Him—the Way, the Truth, and the Life."
-Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

Calling yourself a Christian brings with it the duty and the privilege of a lifetime of service. And when we do it His way, it is a joy. That is why I am here. That is why I am a missionary. And that is why I will never stop being a missionary. I'm not at the end; I'm in the middle. I love this work. I love the gospel of Jesus Christ. I love my Savior with all of my heart. I love my mission.

Sister Szilagyi